


Punishments and Red Eyes

by evolsailor



Category: Dangan Ronpa, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Angst, Anorexia, Bad Byakuya, Bulimia, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Heavy Angst, I Blame Tumblr, I Don't Even Know, I refuse to write a rape scene so dont worry, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Please Don't Kill Me, Poor baby Komaeda, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, good ending, im sorry guys, more to be added - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-31
Updated: 2017-03-28
Packaged: 2018-09-21 03:36:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 19
Words: 4,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9529922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evolsailor/pseuds/evolsailor
Summary: Komaeda wasn't ready for the real world.





	1. Melting

You’re done.  
Honestly, just done. Done hurting everyone you love, done with the disgusting feeling of disappointment, done with the bites on your thumb and the scars on your thighs.  
You’re falling apart.  
Hinata. Hajime Hinata. He’s the last bit of glue holding you together. That’s not to say you aren’t hurting yourself just as much; once you were released into the Real World, after the despair was calm enough, when Hinata could keep Kamukura under wraps, cutting was the first punishment you could think of.  
_It’s PUNISHMENT TIME!_  
Purging, too, but that’s different. No matter how disgusting and wiry and bony you get, you crave to be thinner, the logical part of your brain fizzling out finally-  
“Ko?”  
_Ko. Baby. Honey. Nagito. Sweetheart._  
Your head snaps up when Hinata’s arms wrap around your horrifyingly skinny waist.  
“Hello.” You tilt your head back to rest on his shoulder. You want to melt into him. To become part of something so beautiful. You wish you could honestly live your life attached to him.  
“Your tea’s getting cold.”  
You remember the mug in your hands. He slowly takes your hands in his, taking it from you, sipping it softly.  
“Tea’s good cold,too.” You whisper.  
“I’ve never been a fan.” He sits it away. He’s holding you tightly.  
You breathe him in and out.  
“You do remember what day it is, don’t you?”  
Tuesday.  
**_Tuesday._**  
You try to pretend you’re not screaming in your head.  
He helps you stand, because you’re melting, but this time into the floor, a disgusting Nagito-puddle.  
“I don’t think I need to be weighed.”  
He’s taking you to the bathroom. Normally, you put weights in your pockets and bloat with water.  
But you forgot. Of course you did.  
You honestly think you’re going to vomit.  
You were standing on the scale, teetering, you are about to blow away when-  
Hinata makes a choked noise.  
You squint and glance down.  
89 pounds. Delightful. Disgusting.  
“Honey, I-”  
You can’t breathe because you’re crying and you’re sorry, so sorry, and he’s grasping onto you and god, he’s going to call Mikan and everyone and you are going to die-  
“Ko. Nagito. Breathe, baby.”  
You can’t.  
“Hey. Hey.”  
Hope. Despair. The spear, dangling above you, the knife plunging into your thigh, Junko, Monaca-  
Hinata.  
**K a m u k u r a.**  
Strong hands, red eyes, you can’t stop him, this isn’t Hinata this isn’t Hajime,you can’t get him off you and he’s trying to kiss you, your lips hurt, it all hurts-  
He grabs your hands.  
You’re screaming.


	2. Hinatasmell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's all slipping out.  
> It's all slipping away and you. cannot. stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EEEEEP!!!!! I will update every day of the week at around 7:30 am except for saturdays and sundays.

There’s phone calls and bandages after. Soft forehead kisses. Baby. Honey. When you’re curled up in bed (fabric softener,Hinatasmell, one word.), you hear a rare occurrence.

Chiaki and Hinata are fighting.

“He needs inpatient care.”

“They never help him, Chiaki. You know inpatient messes with him.”

“He’s getting worse, Hajime! You can’t just take care of him on your own. I know you love him, but Makoto agrees with me-”

“Of course he does. I’m wrong, you’re right. That’s the script.”

There’s that edge in his pretty voice.

“That isn’t what I meant.”

“I know what you meant.”

_She needs to run,flee, hide under the couch, he might not be Hajime he could hurt her-_

A door slams. Soft footsteps. Pitter pitter patter. Chiaki walks in. Gentle face, Chiakismell, one word.

She kneels next to your bed. “Hi, Nagito. Are you feeling okay?”

_No._

“I’m...alright.”

“Hajime left, but he’ll be back soon. Is it alright if I take care of you for a while?”

 _Kamukura hurt me, right there in the kitchen by the fridge, he hurt me and I can’t tell_.

“Of course it is.”

 

It slips out when he touches you. It’s maybe a month after It.

After more nightmares that you pretend are just the simulation nightmares, after sleeping pills and lingering Chiakismell where she stays in the guest room. And you’re kissing, Hinata all sort of embarrassed like he always is. When he grabs your hips a little and bites your lip.

“NO!”

It explodes out of you.

Why didn’t you scream like that before?

You’re pushing him away because you need to throw up and you don’t want to on him, and you do it over the couch. You’re shaking and crying.

“N-nagito? What was that?”

You whisper it.

“Kamukura.”

Cursed name.

His face twists. Oh no. He realizes what it is, what IT is.

 

Questions. Why didn’t you tell him?

_Because you’d cry and you did,you cried, cried, cried._

You tell him, about the biting and the crying.

“Nagito….” He holds you.

You’re choking on his Hinatasmell.

He brushes hands through your hair.

 

Chiaki makes eggs that same morning, and you look at them, choking.

_Can't eat won't eat shouldn't eat. ~~Hungry .~~ Empty.  ~~Its scrambled your favorite~~. You hate eating.  ~~You're so hungry.~~_ ~~~~

They're both looking at you. You pick up the plate- scrambled eggs with cheese, 228 calories, a bagel with cream cheese, 270, coffee with extra cream and sugar, 110.

A plate = 608.

You pick up a fork. It must weigh a thousand pounds. 

You shove eggs past your teeth, down your throat, into your fantastically empty stomach.

You drink coffee like it's going out of style.

You clean the whole plate.

You spend that night secretly throwing it all up, dying of embarrassment. 


	3. Breathless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You cannot stand therapy.

They found out your little secret.

If you simply must go to the bathroom, somebody stands in front of the door, listening for the sound of you purifying yourself.

89\. 95. 100.

You're weighed every day now.

Sometimes, when you see it stack up, you cry, and Hinata shushes you and presses against you.

 

Hinata leaves for a while, in March. When his Hinatasmell- it's like linen and soap and  _hope_ \- is fading from the bedsheets, you stop sleeping.

You sit up tonight. You crawl to the kitchen. A knife somehow finds it way into your hand.

On the bathroom floor,you carve a perfect line into your thigh. The feeling is euphoric. You almost laugh at the release of blood slipping down. You carve another line into your chest, into your stomach. You feel so  _strong_. You'll bleed out. You'll rid Hinata of your disgusting, disgusting presence.

You lean back, watching blood spill.

Somebody screams. Chiaki? Chiaki?

 

In the hospital, you sleep for a while. You feel somebody hold your hand. Hinatasmell. Hinata!

He sleeps with his head resting on your thigh. He drools a little.

You cry when he wakes up. He kisses you. His breath is minty.

He climbs on top of you.

 

How long has it been? Since IT. It's been months.

Since you...no, not sex. The word is too dirty.

Made love.

It's different, now. He calls you beautiful at one point. He kisses the scars. Holds your hands.

 

It's almost okay until Makoto calls.


	4. Phone Calls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Junko worshipers. People worshiping the woman who ruined your life.  
> Like it wasn't bad enough already, right?

The 87th class of Hope's Peak academy has been kidnapped.

The Future Foundation is scrambling.

But how can you focus? A Junko worshiper kidnapped these students, posted pictures of Makoto and his friends on the door; but you're too wrapped up in your own pity.

Hinata. He's holding your hand. You're finally leaving the hospital with 45 stitches, isn't that weird? Too many, you think. 

You want to rip them out with pliers.

You sleep in the car. You dream. Of the island. Of blood, dead bodies. Junko's hand on your arm. 

You dream for a long,long time.

 

You should be an actor!

You've rehearsed your lines.

_yes, i'm okay ~~i'm never ever okay~~_

_no i am not having nightmares ~~the kitchen floor, hands holding me down, kamukura, he's hurting me hurting me HURTING ME~~_

~~~~_yes my stitches are fine ~~every step rips me apart~~_

 

Hinata.

HinataHinataHinata.

He's giving you rules.

_1\. No talking down to yourself._

Pretty. You try to call yourself pretty.

_2\. Eat every day._

Milkshakes and pancakes and cheeseburgers.

_3\. Take all of your pills._

Crazy candies. Drugs. Happy. 

_4\. I love you, Nagito._

Why?

 


	5. I'm Not Your Master, I'm Your Boyfriend

Hinata is shielding you. Or so he thinks.

Those students are dying. Bodies are turning up. The Ultimate Victims, you think.

You looked them all up. You sent the ones who were still alive the few bits of good luck you had left.

But kept the biggest chunk for yourself, like the selfish monster you are. Ha.

 

Hinata is the luckiest thing in your life. He is your hope and your life and everything you need.

You're sitting in between his legs. He's on the couch and you're on the floor, as it should be. He'd disagree. Your cheek rests against his thigh.

Breaking news, the TV says. Body found.

The new Ultimate Lucky Student is dead. COD suggests punishment. Which suggests murderer.

You guess she wasn't so lucky,was she?

 

It's the middle of the night. A few months since the lucky student died, since another few bodies were found.

You're alone in bed.

You sit up. The TV is blaring. Words of a newscaster. 

Wobbly legs carry you into the living room. Chiaki and Hinata are watching.

"What's going-"

Hinata pulls you into his lap. He's smiling. 

"They found them, Nagito. They found them."

 

6 out of 16 survived, led to freedom by Misato Sakata, the Ultimate Poet.

You meet them a few days later. Hope shines from them. (You hate to say it, but they're still not as beautiful as Hinata. Nobody is. Or ever will be.)

They're saved.

But the mastermind is missing.


	6. Hopeful People

So. You like drawing.

Wow, that's a dumb way to start things.

You figured it out with Misato. You mean, Sato. Nicknames = Friendship!!! Friendship with beacons of hope like Sato and Makato and Chiaki.

You're dating one of those hopeful people. One of those hopeful people says he loves you. Loves! LOVES!

So, you're friends with Sato. They actually  _hang out with you and show you their poems and you're watching a show together like friends do!!!!_ And your hands sit idle.

"So, Komaeda." They say. They smile at you.

"So?" You glance over at them. Not she nor he. Them. You don't even question it.

"What do you do for fun?"

 _Um, starve myself? Obsess over Hinata? Sleep?_ "Um..."

"Whoa, that's not an 'Um' question. I mean, like, express yourself." They sit up. They have pale blue eyes, glittery hopeful hopeful hopeful eyes.

"I don't know."  _I cut a really pretty pattern into my skin last night, wanna see?_

They bite their lip. "You have nice hands. Here."

They reach into a raggedy old backpack and hand you something. A sketchbook. A pencil. There are doodles of their own friends.  _Yumiko, Ultimate Make-Up Artist, Hibiki, Utimate Fan Artist, Momoru, Ultimate Marksman...._

 _"_ Artist hands. Do you draw?" 

 _Yes, only in my skin._ "No."

"Try it. I'm friends with kind of a lot of artists. I have a sixth sense for this."

 

You draw.

You draw Hinata, Chiaki, Sato, a dog you saw from your window. Your parents. HinataHinataHinata.

You draw more on paper, less on your skin. You take care of your artist hands. One metal,one flesh, both good at holding a pencil.

 

110 pounds.

100.

98.

95.

You're slipping into old habits.

Disgusting.


	7. We've Got Our Obsessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wanna wipe out all the sad ideas that come to me when I am holding you.

Misato Sakata had a nervous breakdown last week and is now in the care of the Future Foundation, despair leaking out of them.

You curl up in bed with Hinata. He kisses your nose. 

You breathe in Hinatasmell until you drown in it.

 

The next morning, Chiaki steps out. Hinata is asleep.

And you are going to go shopping.

You don't get out much. Duh. The real world will swallow you whole. But you pack your pockets with Hinatakisses and Chiakismiles. Those will get you through the supermarket.

You leave a sticky note on Hinata's phone.

_We needed some milk and eggs. Be back soon. -N_

Eggs. Milk. You can handle eggs and milk.

You step outside. The world is loud and screaming, so you pop headphones into your ears and pull your hood over your head.

_Sunday, wake up/Give me a cigarette_

Music carries you to the supermarket. You float to the eggs. You float to the dairy section. You grew wings at some point, probably.

_Supermarket/Oh what packet of crackers to pick?_

Whole milk. Two percent.

_They're all the same/One brand, one name/But really they're not_

You brain buzzes. Lowfat. No fat.

_Look, look just choose something quick/People are staring/Time ticker quickens/ Must do something, something, something_

Somebody is behind you. A man.

He grabs your...butt?

He whispers a filthy thing. He knows. He knows who you are.

_Pressure overwhelming/Next minute/I am turning out of the door/Facing one week without food!_

You fly away. 

_A day a day/When things, things are pretty bad_

Hinata is there when you get home. You tell him and he holds you and spoon-feeds you soup. He says it's okay.

_But don't let it make you feel sad/The crackers were probably bad luck anyway_

You fall asleep with tears on your cheeks and Hinata holding you.

As if you're going to float away.

 

 

 

 


	8. Are You Truly Hopeful?

All of the people you thought were perfect are falling. 

Makoto was raped. The word hits you like a shock wave, frying you, slipping into your bones.

You need to see him.

 

But you see Sato first. Hope still glitters in their eyes, but it's clouded. You show them your drawings. Then watch cooking shows.

In your head, you see only Kamukura.

 

You thought you wanted Hinata to treat you roughly. To pull your hair and bite you and leave bruises on your hips.

Until the night he came home late. But not as himself.

Until Kamukura kicked you down and you screamed but he was already on you. He choked you until you shut up.

Filthy words. Digging his fingernails into your sides. Your tears dribbling into your mouth.

He left you bleeding on the floor, a broken shell. You cried until your throat was raw from crying.

You need to speak to Makoto.

 

Byakuya. You met him once. He didn't seem like a rapist.

But he was.

Despair ate his morals. Despair pinned Makoto, the Ultimate Hope, against the wall.

You remember trying to wash Kamukura away, scrubbing until your skin was red, using up the bodywash. 

But Kamukura had Hinatasmell all over him. He didn't deserve to smell like him. Like soap and oranges and Hope.

 

Hinata holds you on the couch. You breathe. In and out. 

"Nagito?"

You look up. "Yes?" 

He smiles at you. What did you do to deserve him? To get such good luck?

"I, uh. I got you a present." He's blushing. "I actually got it a few weeks ago. But..."

He gets up. He comes back with a bag. 

It's.

What?

It's a nightgown. As in, for a woman. White silk fabric.

He's muttering about being sorry and having the receipt and being a pervert and-

"Put it on me." You smile.

He lifts your shirt over your head and you shimmy out of your jeans. You hold your arms up. The silk is cool on your skin.

He takes a deep breath when he looks at you. His face is completely red. 

"Do I look bad?" You gulp.

He runs his hands across your arms. He brings your own hands to his chest.

"No," He says, softly. He kisses your forehead, feather light. "You look beautiful."

You laugh. 

"What's so funny?" He chuckles. 

You just shake your head and kiss him, letting him press you down against the bed.

"You smell nice." He says, face still red.

"What?"

"You smell nice." He repeats, pressing his face into your neck and sniffing.

"What do I smell like?"

"I don't know. Strawberry shortcake. Vanilla. You smell sort of sweet."

So there's such a thing as Komaedasmell.

He treats you so gently, better than you deserve.

You love him.

You love him so much.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry about my messy posting schedule! School is busy nowadays. You're all amazing with this support! Also my poor son omg it pains me to write this too. Thought I'd give you some fluff for relief?


	9. Ayame Hanabi

Evil has been captured.

Sort of.

The mastermind shot herself in the head in front of the Ultimate Poet/Killing School Life Survivor/Future Foundation Analyst Misato Sakata, known as Sato to friends.

That's what the lady on the news said.

Sato is reeling. They tried to talk Ayambe Hanabi, Mastermind of The Kidnapping, away from the gun.

They failed. Her blood hit the wall in a spray. 

You wonder if Sato will put a bullet in their brain too.

 

Hinata leaves again. To try and get control over Kamukura in an isolation chamber at the foundation.

When you miss him too much, you draw him and trace the patterns cut into your skin. Chiaki teaches you to play her games. You die a lot.

 

You could crunch glass.

Burn yourself. Jump off the roof.

So many fun ways to die.

 

You get to talk to Makoto tomorrow.

 

 

What fucking fun.


	10. A/N: Update

A/N:  
Sorry, guys! I can't update today due to time limits and exhaustion. But I promise a longer chapter tomorrow. Ciao!


	11. Rules To Keep

He won't let you call him Master.

When he said no, you tried Sir. That was a no, too.

You feebly tried Daddy. That made him choke on his sandwich and scream, "GOD NO!"

"What am I supposed to call you, then?"

You sprawled across his legs. He patted your head and you leaned into his touch.

"Uh, my name?"

"Hinata-kun?"

"Um..." He bit his lip and swallowed. You leaned up and tried to catch his Adam's apple in your mouth. He laughed.

"No, no. From now on..you  _have_ to call me Hajime."

" _Have_?"

"You wanted rules, right?" He slipped your shirt up, rubbing circles into the small of your back. You made a mewling noise.

"Y-yes."

"Great. There's a rule I like."

"Okay."

He raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, Hajime."

He smiled and kissed your nose.

 


	12. Hope Survives In Him

You call Makoto instead of meeting him.

"You've reached Makoto Naegi." He says in a serious tone. You laugh because Makoto is anything but.

"Komaeda?" He says softly. Your raspy laugh would always give you away.

"Yes. Yes. It's me. Are..."

"Am I okay?"  
"Are you?"

"Enough. Byakuya's in jail. I have a therapist."

"I hate therapy."

"I know."

You share a silence.

"Listen, are  _you_ okay?"

The concern in his voice chokes you up. You can't think of the last time you spoke to him, and you're blathering about Kamukura and the man at the supermarket.

The mean words in your head.

_FatWorthlessMistakeUselessStupidFat._

"Hey. Hey. D-deep breaths."

In out,in out.

"Is Hinata there?"

"He's asleep. I should be. I'm not following the rules."

Hinata gave you more when you begged for them.

"Begging's a good look for you," He said, blushing, which made you melt.

 _Don't cut. Oh my god, Ko...fine. Stricter, if you want. Don't...ugh. Don't touch yourself. That's for me to do._ Blushing.  _Are those panties? I'm buying more of those. This feels so weird._

He's slipping into his role, enforcing rules, the blushing and nervousness faded.

_About the panties. You're wearing those from now on. You look...pretty in them._

"Komaeda?" Makoto brings you back to the real world. 

"Sorry. I'm here."

"I have to go. We can talk more later."

"Okay. Bye."

When he hangs up, you listen to the dial tone. Then you creep back to bed. Hnata's waiting.

"Sorry..." You mumble. 

He rolls his eyes. "You're so weird. It's fine. C'mere."

_C'mere._

You find yourself in his lap.

You're here, you think, as he slips your clothes off and bites your neck, leaving red marks. Marking you as his. 

_I'm here._


	13. Wires

Chiaki Nanami lived in a shell.

A program in an exoskeleton.

Wires on a metal set of bones, false fleshy skin.

But she felt so real.

So real.

 

You cook for ~~Hinata~~  Hajime that morning.

But of course, after he thanks you and eats, he grabs another plate.

Two wildberry muffins. Two bagels with cream cheese. A pancake drenched in syrup, orange juice.

 ~~It smells so good it all wants to crawl in you and fill you up then you can cuddle with hinata~~ You hate eating. The smell makes you sick.

You choke it all down.

It takes an hour to eat a meal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: and ya'll thought i wouldn't make a bagel joke (*u*)


	14. Brrng

Misato is calling. When you answer, they're crying.  
"I fucked up, Nagito. I fucked up."  
When they show up at your apartment, they have tears on their cheeks.

They knew Ayame. They dated her, actually.  
"I loved her, Ko. I thought I could fix her, you know?"  
You cluck your tongue. "Despair is hard to fix."  
They sob into your shoulder.

You draw that night until your hand aches-the flesh one. You draw Sato, messy hair,sad eyes, with blood on their hands.  
The door...opens.

Kamukura drags you to the bedroom by your hair.

You wake up in the hospital.

Again.


	15. What Happened

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i PROMISED not to write a rape scene-and I won't- but this bit gets heavy, which is why I made it skippable. Also sort of ooc kamukura??? I'm srry

The door....opens.

"Hello." He says, calmly, fingers touching your skin, pulling your head back to look at him.  
You can't even get out "Iz-" before he slams his lips on yours.  
His kiss is hard and and you try to scream against his mouth, banging your fists on his chest.  
"Stop." He knocks you back against the wall and you cry out.   
"Haji-Hajime..."  
He stares you down. "You think he's coming to save you? Really? You need to remember just who you belong to. You were the one who wanted rules, Nagito."  
You scream and he backhands you, making you scream again.   
He sighs. "Whore. I think that's the word for you- a boring, stupid slut."  
"P-please." You whimper. "Just...I-I'll do what you want, I will, j-just be gentle, p-please...."  
He glares down at you.  
"Master." You sob.  
He kicks you hard in the stomach. You screech and double over.  
"You're still boring, but I kind of like the way that sounds. And no, I won't be gentle. There's no reason to be."  
"P-please!"  
He grabs a fistful of your hair and pulls, making a disgusted sound when you scream again, dragging you down the hall.  
"On the bed."  
You crawl up, melting again. He is loathsome when he touches you.  
Because he is being gentle.  
Is he going to ruin this for you?  
He kisses you softly and runs his hand down the curve of your spine.  
"Is this gentle?"   
You nod, timidly.  
He pushes you back against the headboard so hard the bed shakes. You have no screams left.  
"Good. A quiet whore is easier to deal with."  
His hands. Dear god no.  
"Hajime..."


	16. Sleepless Nights

You wake up the same way you did last time.  
To Hinata. No. To Hajime.  
He's crying, holding your hand tightly, sitting in the blue chair by the bed.   
"Hajime?" You whisper, hoarsely.  
"Nagito!" His head snaps up with a relieved smile. It fades fast.  
"I'm sorry." He puts your hands on either side of his face. "I w-woke up, and you were bl-bleeding....oh god,honey. I thought....I didn't think he could...."  
"It wasn't you." You sigh.   
"Listen. Chiaki's gonna move in, permanently. Even if we're alone, if Izuru tries to get you....she'll hear you....s-scream."

When he goes to get something, you stumble to the bathroom to look at yourself. Every inch of your body hurts. You see a walking bruise when you look in the mirror. You have a black eye. They're on your back too. And stomach, where he kicked/kneed you until you literally vomited.  
You cry until you can't cry anymore.


	17. So Good

The Remnants of Despair lived in a communal area just outside the Future Foundation building.  
After IT the second, Hinata decided you were moving there.  
Sonia hugged you. You just stood there, stiff.  
Why...were...they....happy to see you?  
Even Hiyoko was sort of happy in her own way. She still called you a disgusting weirdo, but her heart didn't seem to be in it.  
Hinata took you to the room you shared after dinner. You fell back down, and into his arms.  
"That...."  
"Hey, you were good, okay? Really good. I'm really proud, honey."  
You made a hiccuping sound.  
"They were happy to see you, Ko, they were. Didn't you see?"  
You shake your head, covering your face with your hands.  
"Babe, look at me."  
You glanced up.  
"There's a pretty face." He smiled softly.  
You fell asleep curled in his lap while he read his emails.


	18. All Things End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every end arrives.

Your name is Nagito Komaeda.  
No. No, that's not right.  
My name is Nagito Komaeda.  
I am thirty two years old, somehow. I have been diagnosed with a grocery list of conditions.  
I am in love with Hajime Hinata.  
I have friends who care about me. I have people who love me, who support me, who understand....  
I was raped by Izuru Kamukura. Twice.  
There's no escaping it.   
I was treated as a slave by a group of children.  
There's no denying it.  
My luck cycle has hurt me and everyone I loved.  
Until him.  
Hajime. He'll always cancel me out with his own luck. As long as I am around him, I am the luckiest man on Earth.  
As long as we're together....  
We can become Hope.


	19. Author's Note

I would like to make some things clear.  
Due to my writing style, some scenes got lost in translation....one awesome reader suggested I write a timeline. Here's a short IMPORTANT EVENTS in order of occurance. 

-Izuru rapes Nagito  
-Nagito confesses this  
-Nagito attempts suicide   
-New Killing Game begins  
-That Thing You All Hate Me For (Byakuya attacks Makoto)  
-Misato 'Sato' Sakata saves six surviving students  
-Misato short-lived Despair Disease   
-Makoto finally reports attack  
-Ayame Hanabi commits suicide in front of Misato  
-Misato blames themselves  
-Izuru rapes Nagito again  
-Nagito and Hajime move to Foundation care  
-This story is garbage   
-The End!

I just want to thank you all. I suffer from depression and anxiety, and some of Nagito's actions reflected my own in this, though I have never suffered through rape like he has, and I've never had an eating disorder. However, I'm recovering from self-harm and I suffer from a lot of suicidal thoughts. People liking this story so much....it gave me hope. Pun intended.

 

 

( time for shameless self advertisement) And if anyone likes Misato's story.....there's a fangame coming out centered around them! I hope you'll play....:U


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